Microsoft is reading your Instant Messages!

In a recent study by Microsoft it basically admitted to spying on us all, to prove the “Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon” theory.

With records of 30 billion electronic conversations among 180 million people from around the world, researchers/spies have concluded that any two people on average are distanced by just 6.6 degrees of separation, meaning that they could be linked by a string of seven or fewer acquaintances.

The database covered the entire Microsoft Messenger instant-messaging network in June 2006, or roughly half the world's instant-messaging traffic at that time, researchers said

"To me, it was pretty shocking. What we're seeing suggests there may be a social connectivity constant for humanity," said Eric Horvitz, a Microsoft researcher who conducted the study with colleague Jure Leskovec. "People have had this suspicion that we are really close. But we are showing on a very large scale that this idea goes beyond folklore. And we have read some really strange stuff, some of it involving hamsters."

Jane Doe, one of the contracted spies told NTS “I was amazed at the amount of people, boys and girls, from all over the globe that have fantasies involving hamsters.”

Enter Kevin Bacon

Kevin and "Harry Hamster" give Six Degrees interview.

The Microsoft research focused on the popular concept that has inspired games such as Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon and a well-known play by John Guare. A "degree of separation" is a measure of social distance between people. You are one degree away from everyone you know, two degrees away from everyone they know, and so on.

We contacted Kevin Bacon and his agent told us that "Yes Kevin has had many hamsters over the years, he uses them to get into character."

We then watched Hollow Man to check for hamster character references, and boy were we suprised.

Subliminale frame from Hollow Man

We started looking into the "hamster" thing and found that they are pretty cool.

Hamster powered computer.

Not only can they inspire actors and directors.

Yes Director Terry Gilliams company is called The Hamster Factor. And there are hamsters in every movie he has ever directed, really.

In The Twelve Monkey's there is a scene in which James Cole (Bruce Willis) is seen taking a blood sample from himself after his return from the surface world. Barely noticeable in the background there is a silhouette of a hamster on an exercise wheel projected on a screen. While Willis performed his scene flawlessly the hamster had difficulty running on cue.

Well we asked Bill Gates office for a comment and they said "You are all wierd, what's with all the hamster stuff?"

We went to the pet store and bought ourselves a cute little hamster named "Happy" Next week we see if Happy can power a cell phone.

Home

More Made Up News